Never go shopping with my family

This weekend we packed up the kids and took a little trip up to the outlet malls in Williamsburg. I completely forgot that there are sales on Veteran’s day and because I have no school age children I also forgot it was a holiday weekend. Had we known we probably would have avoided the crowds but once we’d driven an hour there it was too late.

The trip wasn’t all bad, despite the fact that they were playing Christmas music in most the stores. I’m not going to lie and say the early Christmas music was the issue, actually I’m totally ready for the holidays to be here this year. My issue is that jingle bells is just one of those songs that should never EVER be remixed. When it comes to Christmas music I stick with the classics all Hanson, all the time.

Anyway, I sat for an hour in the Carter’s store (jingle bell hell), playing at the puzzle table while Nic “used the restroom”. After he got back we moved on to the Jockey store. Why did I ever think my family could handle going into an underwear store? WHY?!

Jockey has this man underwear that has a special remastered crotch pocket or something. They look weird like a they have a little pouch up front, or maybe to Conner they looked like a puppet, because that was what he decided to use the sample pair they had out as. Mean while as Conner is puppeteering, Nic holds up a pair of man bikini bottoms and announces “Do they make this as just a strap and pouch?!” than starts giggling like a 12 year old. Beau is pointing at all the crotch mannequins, and happily singing “butt, butt, that’s a butt, butt, BUTT!” Just as I start to lift a mannequin to rub the butt on Beau’s head (which would have been hilarious) I realize. HOLY CRAP! We are in public!! I grab my crew and hustle everyone out of the store, time to remove all of our immature selves from the Jockey store and head back home.

So fair warning, don’t go shopping with us unless you too like to make innapropriate comments about underwear or enjoy humiliation.