So we’ve been touring different rental homes in our area looking for our next temporary home. Yesterday we did a walk through on a town home and I feel so bad for the poor mom who was home when I brought my children through her house. Let me give you an idea of what to expect if we showed up at your door for a tour,
On the way to check out the house all the kids feel asleep in the back of the car so we had to wake them up to go in. My kids are the WORST grumps when they’ve been woken from a car nap, Conner insists that his limbs no longer work, Beau is panicked trying to locate the action figures he fell asleep holding that are now MIA. Panic, confusion, and whining are the norm, but Tillie adds a small element of compliance (she can’t walk so what does she have to complain about anyway). Eventually we get everyone out of the car and to the front door, the leasing agent looks a little scared as Conner scowls at her demanding to know if we live here now. She lets us in with a smile and lets us know that the tenent is home (soooo awkward cruising through someone else’s place while they’re still there but whatever).
The tenant is sitting on the living room couch feeding a tiny baby that looks only a few days old, she has a two year old in a highchair near her. The presence of someone else’s small children makes Beau and Conner feel much more at home, and we go on a tour of the upstairs and marvel at the incredible World of Warcraft themed decor in EVERY room. At some point we have lost Beau, we return downstairs and find him in the living room with the mom who is still feeding her baby. Beau is using her leg to steady himself as he strips naked, because we’re indoors so obviously it must be naked time. You can imagine the look on the lady’s face, trying to feed/shield her child while my son patiently reassures her with some gibberish that probably translated to this,
“Hi, do you come with the house? I like your baby. Can you help me get my pants off my shoes and is there a specific corner to poop in or this a free range household?”
I rescued the poor woman, clothed my child and we began backing towards the door. The leasing agent continued to go on and on about the amazing perks that come with the house, you know things like a dishwasher and washer/dryer hookups. Conner takes this as a sign to march into the kitchen and look for a snack, because you know since we were there why not demand a sandwich from poor couch lady. He is put off by the fact that all the food does not come with the house and decides he doesn’t want to live here. We scoot on out and let couch mom go back to enjoying her too-young-to-be-poorly-behaved children.
I hope we find something soon, because touring other people’s homes is weird.